Drinking a cup of hot Mlio in the midnight keep me feel warm...not as like just now..
Cool and helpless. Open the chat box with nothing to chat....Look at the facebook
got nothing to do......
Homework? Done already......Look at the time, is almost 12am and I still cant fall into sleep...
Some said open the facebook is for relaxing and enjoyment, but for me, different.
Facebook do make me uncomfortable, in reason that checking status and photo
the people I don't like much..
It just like a cold war between them... So I try to be myself, but can I really do that?
Well it is hard man... it is... not couple days job...Like my friend said, don't mind them because ...
you still have a year to go....Yeah, she is right....
Every time I pick up the phone and call Miss.L my tears almost burst out...
But for sure I will feel better after I call her up....
I don't want to annoy her , but I don'tr know who I should call up too....
She is one the first one I want to call every time I feel very tension...
The way she talk just like what I want really to heard...
Sometime, she help her from being such a loser... she teach me how is the society I stand for...
And I really thankful for what she teach, if I got a chance I will say a 100 times or even 1000 times
'thank you' to her.....I know I have feeling toward her since I meet her..but I just lie to myself...
And Rachel... is special one, she just like a 'big sister' in the school where she looking up for me...
Example.. tell me where I am wrong, correct my speaking...sometime she may just get hot-temper..
but I know she is cool...
I also cry out when I call her up because of the conflict of MPU... What a joke from me...
Because she already help me a lot.. so sometime i try to hide out my problem and try to
buried it myself.....
I just can't always ask her to listen what I said.. Well if she don't care....
When I think again, I wasn't as strong as other people think I am.
I cry inside myself.
I feel alone.
I lost my best friend.
But I don't want to miss the friend I have now.
I lost my best friend.
But I don't want to miss the friend I have now.
Heng, Foong ,Jie,Fai,Ping,Alvin, almost the whole form six.....
I just don't want to loose them....
I doesn't want to talk not because I want to act cool but this is really me...
I really don't talk much in front of people...
As much as I think , the more the losing of my own...
I almost don't know who is the guy in the mirror in the morning...
Some look at me like a freak.. I don't know why...My friend told me to don't mind..
But I can't , because they really look at me like that... the sense from my heart...
Is cutting me like shit.....
12.25am... Tomorrow got school and my still a wake like the morning...
Think why this happen to me...
But I want to live my life happy so I decided continue to write as much as I can..
Try to express my feeling... my true feeling.. my hidden feeling...
Listen to the song I don't understand...chat with a good friend...
Guess I found a good place for me now...
The empty cup on the on the desk beside my mouse just like my mind...
Empty and nothing inside..
I try to fill up with something colorful but the only color I can get is blue....
Try to think of Miss.L but I can't...I don't want people to hate me,
but I don't expect people to like me..
But is it me really don't care about that?
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